Guest VioletX Posted September 14, 2012 Posted September 14, 2012 (edited) Just for fun... Please add to the list Bigfoot Rule #1: FB/FB must and will confirm this list.(on all points) Bigfoot Rule #2: Upon taking or receiving a grainy, paradoelia, Blobsquatch picture and/or video post it to Youtube immediately with a completely inappropriate soundtrack. The corollary to this: Upon taking receiving a HD quality, close up phenomenal picture/video footage immediately post the info. to a obscure Bigfoot site, (even better if it is anonymous in the comments section), and state that you will be releasing the photo/video on the following Monday at 3 pm and then when that time comes...simply disappear with your proof. Bigfoot Rule #3: Learn to spell Pareidolia. Edited September 14, 2012 by VioletX
Guest Posted September 14, 2012 Posted September 14, 2012 Bigfoot Rule #5: Visit Melba Ketchum facebook page and Robert Lindsay blog several times a day but never, ever admit to it.
Guest VioletX Posted September 14, 2012 Posted September 14, 2012 Bigfoot Rule #5: Visit Melba Ketchum facebook page and Robert Lindsay blog several times a day but never, ever admit to it. Excellent! ha!
Guest SquatchinNY Posted September 14, 2012 Posted September 14, 2012 Bigfoot Rules #6 Being caught without a zagnut bar will result in prosecution.
Guest Twilight Fan Posted September 14, 2012 Posted September 14, 2012 (edited) Bigfoot rule #7 Never make a claim as though you know with 100% certainty it is true about Bigfoot, without backing up that claim. That's right, Matt! I'm looking at YOU! Edited September 14, 2012 by Twilight Fan
Guest Posted September 14, 2012 Posted September 14, 2012 Bigfoot rule #8 Look at every case individually. Just because something can't easily be explained doesn't mean it was definitely a squatch...however, if the evidence points in that direction it deserves appropriate attention. Bigfoot rule #9 When Bigfoot is eventually proven to exist (riding on the back of the Loch Ness monster) you'll have to give us Scots some credit (for the record, I think Bigfoot is real, just attempting to be a comedian and failing miserably haha)
Guest SquatchinNY Posted September 14, 2012 Posted September 14, 2012 Bigfoot Rules #10 Bigfoot knows where you live. Period.
Guest Posted September 14, 2012 Posted September 14, 2012 (edited) #11 If it sounds like a bigfoot, throws things, and smells like a bigfoot, but you can't see it, that's a bigfoot. #12 When videotaping investigations, make as much background noise as possible---very loud crunching of gravel is especially good. Breathe loudly. Say "There! Did you hear that?" at random intervals. #13 Even is a sasquatch is right in front of you, pretend you can't see it. #14 Do research at night, so no one can tell what the heck you are trying to show them. Keeps the mystery alive. #15 Talk lak yew got a moufful o mush, with a reel thee-uk ak-sayunt an mek shur yew missspel stuf alot in enny comends sexun. Edited September 14, 2012 by Kings Canyon
Guest Posted September 14, 2012 Posted September 14, 2012 Plagiarized without remorse from one of the folks at the JREF forums. (This is he clever work of a fellow named Sonny2 over there.) 10 rules for telling a good BF story: 1. Make sure everyone knows you're not a kook (even if you are) - give some details about your background, being military or police helps, or maybe a teacher or something respectable. 2. Give lots of setting details to paint the picture. 3. Make sure it's always at night or in fog or something so people don't Q your lack of detail re. the sighting or not having photos. 4. Make sure to tell everyone you're a seasoned outdoorsperson and you've never been scared in the woods until this happened. It helps if you can cry a little or make your voice all shaky. 5. It helps if you say you never believed in Bigfoot or anything weird until this happened. 6. Be sure to tell everyone you didn't want to tell your story for fear of ridicule but were persuaded to, to either help others come out or to give yourself closure. Maybe mention you've been going to the shrink since this happened, but be careful not to overstate this. Having nightmares since it happened is cool. Also state you're afraid to go back into the woods. 7. Mention some weird sounds/smells/unnatural quiet etc. to add to the authenticity. Throw in stuff people would never expect, like it looked like the creature was wearing a balaclava. 8. Rehearse it a few times in case the BFRO calls you on the phone, you can keep the story straight. Heck, if you rehearse it enough, you'll actually start believing it yourself, which helps a lot in the retelling. 9. It helps to have corroborative witnesses, but be sure they're out of the country or now dead or out of touch. 10. Say you went back later with others to look for evidence, but it's rained or snowed and nothing's left.
Guest VioletX Posted September 14, 2012 Posted September 14, 2012 lol, # 10 & 11 struck me as particularly funny #16 Armchair Squatchers; your opinions are equally, if not more valid than those out in the field, feel free to speak loudly and proudly 1
Guest SquatchinNY Posted September 14, 2012 Posted September 14, 2012 #17 Don't look out the bathroom window after 10pm.
Guest VioletX Posted September 14, 2012 Posted September 14, 2012 #17 Don't look out the bathroom window after 10pm. heehee
Guest SquatchinNY Posted September 14, 2012 Posted September 14, 2012 #18 If you are in the woods, better bring extra boxers.
Guest VioletX Posted September 14, 2012 Posted September 14, 2012 #19 Someone at BFF knows more about Bigfoot than you do.
Recommended Posts